20 Things to Remember If You Love a Person With Dyslexia

It’s hard to understand it, isn’t it?

If you’re not one of the ten to fifteen percent of the population with dyslexia, it’s really hard to understand what it’s like.

It’s easy to think that it’s a bit of a scam. That if people with dyslexia worked harder, and really applied themselves, they could “get over it.” But that’s not the case.

Life is actually much more difficult for people with dyslexia. They have brilliant minds, but they’re hard to focus.

Dyslexia is a gift—the gift of being able to see things from lots of different points of view, all at once. But the gift comes with a curse, and the curse is that it’s hard to prioritize, or make sense of, all those perspectives.

People with dyslexia can be hard to live with, and hard to love, because their brains work so differently to ours. Even if you love someone with dyslexia, the day-to-day living with it can drive you insane. Because they can forget things, believe they’ve said or done things they haven’t, be incredibly messy and disorganized, and be less socially aware than other people.

The best thing you can do is to understand more about dyslexia, so you’re less exasperated and more sympathetic.

This is an insight into how their minds work.

1. They have lifestyle challenges.

Dyslexia is much more than just having difficulty reading, writing, and using numbers. They see the world in a completely different way, communicate differently, and have trouble organizing things.

Some people describe it as a lifestyle challenge, others as a lifestyle curse, because it affects almost all aspects of their lives.

2. They can seem weird.

Despite their high intelligence, and because they see so many different perspectives at once, they can appear incoherent in conversation. They can come out with strange ideas, and lack the ability to check if their thoughts are suitable for conversation. They can seem almost autistic because they’re often unaware of social rules.

3. They find details exhausting.

Because their brain is less efficient at processing letters and sounds, it has to work harder—much harder. So any time spent reading, using numbers, or focusing on details is really, really exhausting.

4. They function differently on different days.

Some days they seem to function better than others, and can appear to be improving. Other days, it’s like everything is getting worse. There’s no reason, and no pattern. It just is.

5. They are highly creative.

Their ability to view the world from all perspectives makes them highly creative. They can come up with wildly creative ideas, partly because they’re not constrained by the laws of physics, mathematical logic, or the impossible.

6. They see things that others don’t.

Like words moving on the page, or even off the page, and letters flipping about. You know how challenging it can be to read letters and numbers in captcha? Imagine reading a whole book like that. Or reading a book through a magnifying lens that a child is holding, and moving about.

They can even see the word cat more than 40 different ways.

7. They get overwhelmed by what they see.

They see so many possibilities that their thoughts can become garbled and distorted. It’s hard to sort through all that information and work out what’s important or appropriate. Without the ability to filter, this special gift becomes a tragic, confusing, disability.

8. They are more likely to have ADD.

People with dyslexia are more likely to have ADD. About 40% of people with dyslexia have ADD, and 60% of people with ADD have dyslexia.

9. They can experience thoughts as reality.

They can fully believe they’ve told you something, that they haven’t, or swear that you haven’t told them something that you have.

Often they express themselves in such a unique way that their message hasn’t come across coherently. And they may not realize that this aspect of their communication is part of their dyslexia.

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6 replies on “20 Things to Remember If You Love a Person With Dyslexia”

It was very interesting reading all the information on dyslexia . as a child I was very much behind everyone else in terms at being successful at school exams !!! and in those days ( early 1950’s) Adult people without an understanding of the term Dyslexia , just put you down as stupid !!
So at 15 years old I was sent to work in a clothing factory, but my love was in radio and television technology, So I went to night school which was really helpful and progressed from there to taking an Open University degree ( most of my studies at night time ) after working all day as a television engineer , But my ambition was to be in satellite communications
and I progressed up the ladder to becoming a Satellite Station manager ,
which was extremely interesting , doing a lot of work for the US Navy ,
which got me a trip to their base in Norfolk Virgina and Standing on the flight deck of the USS Harry Trueman !! and even receiving a Thank you Certificate from the Washington communications department, for the satellite work I did for one of the US Presidents !! I often look back at being a kid who was descent to go nowhere !! and now feel very proud of what I achieved !! I am married now with 4-children , one of which has also got dyslexia , and with support she has achieved a degree and an honours degree in architecture !!
So I would say to people who have dyslexia , never give up !! the world is your oyster !!
My favourite Moto is always think outside the box !!!

I have dyslexia and found this article very helpful. I didn’t realize that I have it affecting do many different areas of my life, but it explains alot. I thought just because I am a good reader now I had over come it. I am 65 yrs young and it explains why my life took the path it did. I am not a success by any means I haven’t done any great things, other than made it to this age. Raised 4 kids of my own and about 10 others through foster care and such. I do see things in a different way than others that’s for sure. Self esteem has always been a huge problem for me. I would love to learn how to fix that one…

I also did not discover my dyslexia until I was an adult, in my mid 50s. But when I did it explained so much.
Like you, I’m a good reader. So I flew under the radar at school. But I now realise there, and while studying to be a teacher, I used my dyslexic strengths and visual abilities to overcome weaknesses. In other words, I learnt the way that worked best for me.
Also like you, I struggled with crippling low self esteem and lack of confidence my whole life.
But that all changed when I read – and listened to the audio version – of The Gift of Dyslexia by Ron Davis.
I’d recommend getting hold of a copy, as a starting point. Then if it makes sense and rings true for you, you could always do what I did, which was track down a facilitator who will work with you.
The biggest thing it gave me was a new confidence and healthy self esteem!!

Certainly interesting and haven’t seen many blog posts on this subject. But think it’s a little over states that people with dyslexia can be hard to love! The post does seem to be narrowly focused on on part of the dyslexic range.

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